5 things I remember when I am unemployed

  1. My body needs protein. In fact it needs all kinds of food. Hollowing out a hot-pocket in an attempt to reduce your carbohydrate intake is not going to assuage your nutrient depletion.
  2. I am very sad. I think about killing myself. I think that my life is not worth anything and that everyone thinks so too. I could make my next post be 5 things I don’t like about myself, and it would be as tough a race as… I don’t know insert sportsball analogy here.
  3. I try really hard. For example, at a nice party with people I really do care about, I find myself extremely uncomfortable and perceive all bonds as closer than any I would have. New girl syndrome takes over and my ‘groove’ is lost.
  4. I need structure. Left to my own devices, I flail my way through my days pretty tremendously. I stay up way too late, forget to eat, remember to drink, refuse to be alone and yet somehow also refuse to let anyone be close, and I spend a lot of time being frustrated.
  5. My life is long, and I have a lot of things I want to do. Nevertheless that the hope which lifts up my heart will be immediately followed by racing thoughts and then never followed up on, the big terrible world is out there for at least a little while longer.
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